Dear Younger Self

(Image Source: https://worthyofagape.files.wordpress.com/2013/07/dear-younger-self.jpg)

Two nights ago, I had an eye-opening experience.  I couldn’t sleep so I decided to read through my old diary, and what I found shocked me.  I used vague language and failed to mention most of the significant events from my childhood.  There was no substance!  I am a writer; when the need arises, I express myself through words to vent and heal.  In my poetry journals, I was completely open about what was going on around me and how I was feeling.  However, those poems were written within the last five years.  My diary was started four years prior to my discovery of poetry.  Perhaps I’ve been watching too much “Criminal Minds” because I have an analysis.  I wont give explicit details, but I went through a lot mentally and emotionally.  My memories are crystal clear, but, based on my diary, I was not aware of how I was being affected.  I brushed aside contributing factors as minor annoyances.  I believe that repression is why, years later, I react so explosively; I am overcompensating for my silence in the past.  I don’t want to drag on so I will end with these words, a note to my younger self and girls who have gone through/are going through similar struggles:

“You feel ugly, fat, alone, and hopeless.  You have given up on yourself because no matter how desperate you are to speak up, you are afraid.  Let go of your emotions; allow yourself to scream and cry.  When you feel better, pick yourself up and start anew with your head held high.  It may feel impossible now, but you make it farther than your young mind can imagine.  Do not lose the fire inside of you.  Never stop fighting!”

(Image Source: https://img0.etsystatic.com/024/0/6604282/il_570xN.509481350_gcnr.jpg)

(Image Source: https://fightingchronicpain.files.wordpress.com/2014/04/never-stop-fighting.jpg)

(Image Source: http://media.giphy.com/media/qwj1znuklIGc0/giphy.gif)

“And all those things I didn’t say, wrecking balls inside my brain.  I will scream them loud tonight.  Can you hear my voice this time?  This is my fight song, take back my life song, prove I’m alright song.  My power’s turned on.  Starting right now I’ll be strong.  I’ll play my fight song.  And I don’t really care if nobody else believes ’cause I’ve still got a lot of fight left in me.”

“Fight Song” by Rachel Platten: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xo1VInw-SKc

                                   (Image Source: http://frenchpressmornings.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/Hebrews13.5.png)

(Image Source: http://megansmidt.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/jeremiah-29-11.jpg)

“In the midst of deep sorrow, I see Your light is breaking through.  The dark of night will not overtake me.  I am pressing into You.  Lord, You fight my every battle.  And I will not fear.  I am not alone.  I am not alone.  You will go before me.  You will never leave me.”

“I Am Not Alone” by Kari Jobe: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bfveawSAHJA

(Image Source: http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-IFBiMPMV-jQ/VTb70apiEZI/AAAAAAAAS_M/wk8D5yENqM0/s1600/just-keep-swimming.gif)

(Image Source: http://24.media.tumblr.com/c3a6fcfcb0fc5843efd73dd3e2a394ee/tumblr_mz4anao6Pn1rd0hedo1_500.gif)

(Image Source: http://s1064.photobucket.com/user/kaitlinleighs/media/tumblr_m7utqjHJzL1r9fcwro1_500.gif.html)

(Image Source: http://media.giphy.com/media/13uNYQRS1U6mTC/giphy.gif)

I hope you feel better!  Feel free to talk and/or vent in the comment section.  This is a safe environment.  “See” you soon readers.  :)

Subscribe to my blog to receive email notifications, and check out my other links listed below.

– Lauren Michele <3

Previous Post: https://laurenmichelelifestyle.wordpress.com/2015/09/04/the-fickle-and-the-faithful/

Previous Video:

My Links:

Art Blog: https://laurenmichelephotography.wordpress.com/

Instagram: https://instagram.com/laurenmicheleonline/

Sign Up For MyWebRoom: http://9nl.me/LaurenMichele

Lauren Michele’s MyWebRoom: http://www.mywebroom.com/room/laurenmicheleonline/#

Pinterest: http://www.pinterest.com/lagirl93/

Tumblr: http://laurenmichelephotography.tumblr.com/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/laurenmichele93

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCic1VLw_OuW2fzDQ88oi_AA/feed

 

Advertisements

Kids Say The Darndest Things

(Image Source: https://childdevelopmentgrp10.files.wordpress.com/2015/06/kids-tlking.jpg)

Despite feeling pain in every part of my body, I enjoyed my five-mile hike yesterday.  Here are two photos of what I saw:

Idyllwild

Idyllwild

I was with a group of people from my church that included three brothers.  Despite physical strain and heat, the boys kept the long hike fun.  I will start with two things the youngest brother said:

1. He and his mom were discussing something about his hand.  When she brought up his fingers, he promptly asked “Mom, aren’t these phalanges?”  I had to bite my tongue to keep from laughing out loud.  Phalanges??  Let this be a lesson to haters: Homeschool kids are smart!  Also, he isn’t older than four or five years old.

2. “Mom, who made the hills?”  “God made the hills.”  “Who made the bigger hills?”  “God made the bigger hills.”  “Who made the even bigger hills?”  “God made the even bigger hills.  God made all the hills.”  *Pause*  “Wow!  That’s a lot of work!”  If I had the capability, I would be typing a million laughing emojis right now.

Next up is the oldest brother Charlie.  Where has this kid been all my life??

1. He found and gave me a walking stick for when my hands got tired.

2. He told me if I fell down the mountain, he would catch me.  He added that it would be easy because I am lighter than him.  Major points for the weight compliment!  FYI, he is no older than seven or eight years old.

3. He asked me if I had ever been camping.  I replied “No.”  He then stated that when he grows up, he is going to buy a tent and take me camping.  How cute is that?!!

I am so glad I had the opportunity to be around kids.  I forgot how funny, witty, and intelligent they can be!  It is important to give children boundaries in order to keep them safe and teach them manners.  However, there is so much to learn from their curiosity and courage.  They question everything and jump without inhibition.

I hope you enjoyed this post.  Stay tuned for a very special fashion post coming soon.  Very soon.  Within the next 24 hours.  Get excited!

Subscribe to my blog to receive email notifications, and check out my other links listed below.

– Lauren Michele <3

Previous Post: https://laurenmichelelifestyle.wordpress.com/2015/08/19/from-pack-rat-to-minimalist/

Previous Video:

My Links:

Art Blog: https://laurenmichelephotography.wordpress.com/

Instagram: https://instagram.com/laurenmicheleonline/

Sign Up For MyWebRoom: http://9nl.me/LaurenMichele

Lauren Michele’s MyWebRoom: http://www.mywebroom.com/room/laurenmicheleonline/#

Pinterest: http://www.pinterest.com/lagirl93/

Tumblr: http://laurenmichelephotography.tumblr.com/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/laurenmichele93

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCic1VLw_OuW2fzDQ88oi_AA/feed