Night of the Living Moths

Be honest. You love my bug stories. Need I remind you of the june bug saga?! You can’t make this stuff up!!

• Big Bad June Bug Attack of 2015

• Those Summer Nights

This story begins at midnight on August 28th. I was the last person awake in my household and decided that reading a crime novel would be a great stimulant for sweet dreams. I happened to glance up and see something on the wall. I immediately knew it was a bug and what looked like a moth. Even though I know that they’re harmless, they still make me anxious. While deciding how the heck I was going to dispose of him without disturbing my sleeping family, I didn’t dare move or breathe. In a heart-stopping moment, the moth flew to a new spot on the same wall. Simultaneously I dove off the couch and ran down the stairs, making a beeline (get it?!) for the bug spray & fly swatter. Armed with weaponry, I slowly made my way upstairs. The moth had now moved even lower down the wall, low enough for me to see him up close. Even though I was scared out of my mind, I inched closer until I was halfway behind a wall but still about a foot away from my foe. I thought my fear couldn’t possibly get worse, but then I saw it. This was no ordinary moth. It was the Moth From Hell a.k.a. Mothra. I had never seen a moth with a head like this, if it was actually a moth. It had wings like a moth but a big head that appeared to be red, although I cannot defend the accuracy of what I saw since I had been reading a crime novel. The only thing I can compare it to is the round, red nose of a fighter plane; I’m not even joking.  I couldn’t swat him because my brother was sleeping right behind the wall and had to be up early for work. I knew I had to risk it and use the spray even though Mothra could potentially fly into my face. I’m sure it’s not hard for you to believe that it took me several moments to summon up the courage. Thank God he didn’t move!! I finally pulled up my big girl pants and inwardly commanded myself to JUST DO IT. I assumed the proper stance for quick reaction, said a quick but heartfelt prayer, and sprayed Mothra with the vengeance of Godzilla. Of course he moved so I naturally ran and hid. Big mistake!! When I inched back around the wall, he was G-O-N-E. I thought his movement had been downward due to the lethal spray, but I wasn’t quite ready to search just in case he still had enough life left to fly at me. It was now 1am, and I was panicking. Unfortunately my mom saw the lamplight and decided to see who was still up. She was now part of my late night soap opera episode. We spent the next fifteen to twenty minutes searching the entire house for Mothra. We never found his body. Also, my fear became too much for me, and I cried. I don’t mean pitiful tears; I mean my body was shaking and water was leaking out of my eyes like the California drought was at stake. I calmed down a little bit, but nerves still ruined my night. I shut my bedroom door, which I never do, and after a few more hours of reading because I didn’t want to shut my eyes, I tentatively turned off my light. I had a difficult time falling asleep and woke up several times but did eventually get some rest. It still upsets me that Mothra disappeared. I know what I saw was real, but that’s hard to explain when you’re the only one awake and you’ve been reading a crime novel which amps up imagination. If Mothra reveals himself again, dead or alive, I will add an update. Hopefully tonight is uneventful because I am exhausted. 😭

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– Lauren Michele <3

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MacGyver Moment

If you thought my misadventures as a retail employee were over, think again!  Buckle your seat belt and prepare to be amused.  Let the story begin!

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Carrying a large bag of trash and a medium sized cardboard box, Lauren walks down the creepy hallway and opens the door to the alley where the dumpsters are located.  She looks for the brick used to keep the door open and finds nothing.  The door will lock upon closing if she walks away to put the trash in the dumpster.  She frantically looks around for something to keep the door open.  She uses the trash bag as a temporary solution while throwing away the cardboard box.  Resuming the search, she looks in all directions, her gaze eventually landing on her feet.  It is the only way!  She reluctantly removes her Italian-made boot, places it in between the door and door jamb, and moves as quickly as she can to and from the dumpster in one boot and one Hanukkah sock.  She makes it safely out of the alley, and the boot fulfills its task without a scratch.

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I will leave you to appreciate my ingenuity in solitude. 😉

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– Lauren Michele <3

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The Great Boot Detective

(Image Source: http://sewickleylibrary.org/?attachment_id=2588)

My search began two years ago.  I was browsing through Pinterest and came across a picture of a pair of boots that were cute, stylish, and perfect for fall.  I instantly fell in love and had to know where I could buy them.  The picture I saw was the same picture you see below.  I clicked on the picture to find its source.  I was redirected here: https://www.flickr.com/photos/keikolynn/6377434857/in/photostream

A Flickr member named Keiko posted the picture sans information about where the boots came from.  I did as much digging as I could with only a Flickr image.  I came up with nothing and resigned to living without the boots.  Goodbye love of my life!  Fast forward to August 21,2015.  My mom woke me up sometime after midnight (VERY EARLY) to excitedly inform me that she had found “The Boots.”  Due to the fact that we had completed a five-mile hike the previous day, I was exhausted and not nearly as excited as she was.  I promptly fell back to sleep.  However, when I woke up, I remembered the one-sided conversation and rushed to my computer to see what she had found.  Sure enough, my wonderful mother had finally found “The Boots.”  Here they are: http://www.shoespie.com/product/10990546.html

They are made to order in Italy so it took a few weeks for them to arrive.  What is a few weeks compared to 2 years?!  Finally.  FINALLY I had “The Boots” in my hands.  Thank you mom!!  <3

*** Click each image to make it bigger. ***

Boots_Side 1

Boots_Front

Boots_Side 2

The color differs from the Flickr picture, but I think that has a lot to do with age.  Also, the Flickr picture was taken in the rain so the shoes are wet and therefore look darker.  Despite the appearance being different than what I expected, I have zero complaints.  The color is appealing and versatile, and the shoe is comfortable.  The search was worth it!!

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– Lauren Michele <3

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