I’ve Lost My Touch | Blogmas 2017

My North Pole elf powers have taken a serious hit in the past few years. In 2016, I had to repurchase two gifts due to damage. This year, I received two damaged gifts and was only able to successfully replace one. The other was a handmade, custom item and arrived twice in terrible condition due to measurement issues; I chose to walk away with a refund rather than risk receiving a third defective product. Seriously, what has happened to me?? Gifting used to be my cup of tea, and now I can’t seem to climb out of the funk I’m in. I carefully observe the recipients so I can pick the perfect gifts; I make an airtight budget so I can save and spoil my loved ones; and I buy from trustworthy sources (eBay has disappointed me one too many times). I’m still satisfied with my 2017 gifts, but I can’t help feeling disappointed. On top of my misery, I can’t see Star Wars: The Last Jedi until Monday night. UGH!!! On the bright side, I have a day off (from my retail job) to relax a little bit. Even though I have a to-do list of work that has to get done, I will definitely be squeezing in some baking, Christmas movies, & reading. Happy Saturday!

❄️   ⛄   🕯️   🎄   🎁   ❄️   ⛄   🕯️   🎄   🎁   ❄️   ⛄   🕯️   🎄   🎁   ❄️   ⛄   🕯️   🎄   🎁   ❄️   ⛄

T w o   D a y s   U n t i l   A r t m a s . . .

N i n e   D a y s   U n t i l   C h r i s t m a s . . .

❄️   ⛄   🕯️   🎄   🎁   ❄️   ⛄   🕯️   🎄   🎁   ❄️   ⛄   🕯️   🎄   🎁   ❄️   ⛄   🕯️   🎄   🎁   ❄️   ⛄

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– Lauren Michele ❤︎

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Dear Younger Self

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Two nights ago, I had an eye-opening experience.  I couldn’t sleep so I decided to read through my old diary, and what I found shocked me.  I used vague language and failed to mention most of the significant events from my childhood.  There was no substance!  I am a writer; when the need arises, I express myself through words to vent and heal.  In my poetry journals, I was completely open about what was going on around me and how I was feeling.  However, those poems were written within the last five years.  My diary was started four years prior to my discovery of poetry.  Perhaps I’ve been watching too much “Criminal Minds” because I have an analysis.  I wont give explicit details, but I went through a lot mentally and emotionally.  My memories are crystal clear, but, based on my diary, I was not aware of how I was being affected.  I brushed aside contributing factors as minor annoyances.  I believe that repression is why, years later, I react so explosively; I am overcompensating for my silence in the past.  I don’t want to drag on so I will end with these words, a note to my younger self and girls who have gone through/are going through similar struggles:

“You feel ugly, fat, alone, and hopeless.  You have given up on yourself because no matter how desperate you are to speak up, you are afraid.  Let go of your emotions; allow yourself to scream and cry.  When you feel better, pick yourself up and start anew with your head held high.  It may feel impossible now, but you make it farther than your young mind can imagine.  Do not lose the fire inside of you.  Never stop fighting!”

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“And all those things I didn’t say, wrecking balls inside my brain.  I will scream them loud tonight.  Can you hear my voice this time?  This is my fight song, take back my life song, prove I’m alright song.  My power’s turned on.  Starting right now I’ll be strong.  I’ll play my fight song.  And I don’t really care if nobody else believes ’cause I’ve still got a lot of fight left in me.”

“Fight Song” by Rachel Platten: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xo1VInw-SKc

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“In the midst of deep sorrow, I see Your light is breaking through.  The dark of night will not overtake me.  I am pressing into You.  Lord, You fight my every battle.  And I will not fear.  I am not alone.  I am not alone.  You will go before me.  You will never leave me.”

“I Am Not Alone” by Kari Jobe: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bfveawSAHJA

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I hope you feel better!  Feel free to talk and/or vent in the comment section.  This is a safe environment.  “See” you soon readers.  :)

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– Lauren Michele <3

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Frozen Fitness

Frozen Fitness(Source: http://www.olivera.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/funny-pictures-winter-weight-loss-snowman.jpg)

If only losing weight was that easy!!  If you think I am about to give you an AMAZING workout routine based on a Disney movie about a queen with ice and snow powers, fear not!  Today we are discussing the struggles that accompany working out during winter.  I, like the majority of the world population, made a New Year’s resolution to exercise.  January was the easiest month, so far, to get through; I was motivated and determined.  February was an entirely different story.  My body suddenly decided to realize it is winter and go into hibernation mode.  I was tired all the time from the beautifully dreary weather, and preparing for a workout took extra time in order to overcome freezing temperatures and aching joints.  I hit a wall!  I saw results in January, but February was comparable to running up a hill of ice and expecting to reach the top.  My solution?  I kept going.  I know, I know,  That is a typical and boring answer, but it is the truth.  I got through February with the help of hot baths, layers of warm clothing, and stretching, and the accomplishment feels good.  It is too early to tell if March will be difficult, but I am finally starting to see results again so I am optimistic.  I know I am not the only one struggling with this issue so prepare for an extremely cheesy pep talk: We are in this together!!  You can do it!!  Next time you find yourself facing a workout whilst shivering uncontrollably, remember there are other people going through the same thing (in this case, me).  Don’t let the icicles win!!  Enough of this cheesy talk.  I am starting to annoy myself.  Enjoy the rest of your day readers!

“I believe in process.  I believe in four seasons.  I believe that winter’s tough, but spring’s coming.  I believe that there’s a growing season.  And I think that you realize that in life, you grow.  You get better.”      – Steve Southerland

– Lauren Michele :)

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