“This is a story that I have never told. I gotta get this off my chest to let it go. I need to take back the light inside you stole.”
A few years ago I choreographed a dance routine to “Warrior” for a talent show. I hadn’t danced in awhile so it wasn’t my best performance ever, but something inside me needed an outlet. After I finished, I had to run to the bathroom because I was shaking so bad & sobbing. I’m not open about things in my past because I don’t think it’s something the public needs to know. However, if you are someone who is still healing, you are not alone. Middle school and high school were hell for me, but college was even worse. I suffered for so long and then turned around and made my precious family suffer because of my anger. I was angry at myself for being weak & at God for abandoning me. I hope my mom doesn’t mind me sharing this, but she has told me that she thought she would lose me in college because I was so close to the edge without caring. There is no sugar coating this: I wanted to die.
Tomorrow I turn 25 years old. The broken little girl in middle school didn’t think she would make it this far. The angry college student didn’t want to make it this far. God brought me this far, and He isn’t done yet.
“I waited patiently for the Lord; and He inclined to me, and heard my cry. He also brought me up out of a horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my steps. He has put a new song in my mouth—Praise to our God; many will see it and fear, and will trust in the Lord.” – Psalm 40:1-3
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This story begins at midnight on August 28th. I was the last person awake in my household and decided that reading a crime novel would be a great stimulant for sweet dreams. I happened to glance up and see something on the wall. I immediately knew it was a bug and what looked like a moth. Even though I know that they’re harmless, they still make me anxious. While deciding how the heck I was going to dispose of him without disturbing my sleeping family, I didn’t dare move or breathe. In a heart-stopping moment, the moth flew to a new spot on the same wall. Simultaneously I dove off the couch and ran down the stairs, making a beeline (get it?!) for the bug spray & fly swatter. Armed with weaponry, I slowly made my way upstairs. The moth had now moved even lower down the wall, low enough for me to see him up close. Even though I was scared out of my mind, I inched closer until I was halfway behind a wall but still about a foot away from my foe. I thought my fear couldn’t possibly get worse, but then I saw it. This was no ordinary moth. It was the Moth From Hell a.k.a. Mothra. I had never seen a moth with a head like this, if it was actually a moth. It had wings like a moth but a big head that appeared to be red, although I cannot defend the accuracy of what I saw since I had been reading a crime novel. The only thing I can compare it to is the round, red nose of a fighter plane; I’m not even joking. I couldn’t swat him because my brother was sleeping right behind the wall and had to be up early for work. I knew I had to risk it and use the spray even though Mothra could potentially fly into my face. I’m sure it’s not hard for you to believe that it took me several moments to summon up the courage. Thank God he didn’t move!! I finally pulled up my big girl pants and inwardly commanded myself to JUST DO IT. I assumed the proper stance for quick reaction, said a quick but heartfelt prayer, and sprayed Mothra with the vengeance of Godzilla. Of course he moved so I naturally ran and hid. Big mistake!! When I inched back around the wall, he was G-O-N-E. I thought his movement had been downward due to the lethal spray, but I wasn’t quite ready to search just in case he still had enough life left to fly at me. It was now 1am, and I was panicking. Unfortunately my mom saw the lamplight and decided to see who was still up. She was now part of my late night soap opera episode. We spent the next fifteen to twenty minutes searching the entire house for Mothra. We never found his body. Also, my fear became too much for me, and I cried. I don’t mean pitiful tears; I mean my body was shaking and water was leaking out of my eyes like the California drought was at stake. I calmed down a little bit, but nerves still ruined my night. I shut my bedroom door, which I never do, and after a few more hours of reading because I didn’t want to shut my eyes, I tentatively turned off my light. I had a difficult time falling asleep and woke up several times but did eventually get some rest. It still upsets me that Mothra disappeared. I know what I saw was real, but that’s hard to explain when you’re the only one awake and you’ve been reading a crime novel which amps up imagination. If Mothra reveals himself again, dead or alive, I will add an update. Hopefully tonight is uneventful because I am exhausted. 😭
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I recently reread the first three books of The Baby-Sitters Club series, and the nostalgia was overwhelming. I remember being inspired back in the day to make my own “kid kit” and be the best babysitter EVER. I’ve been blessed to care for children of all ages, and I like to think that I made some kind of positive impact on their lives. This is starting to sound heartwarming so let me put on the brakes because this is not about the good times. Be honest; you’re here to laugh at my expense. 😂 This is a more accurate description of what you’re about to read:
Just to be clear, I am a responsible babysitter, and nothing dangerous has ever happened in my care. The tales I’m about to reveal weren’t directly my fault, just a handful of humorous and unfortunate events.
– Board Game Gone Wrong –
The brother & sister I was babysitting suggested we play chutes and ladders, and I eagerly agreed because I thought it would be fun to relive my childhood. I have to be honest and tell you that I got beat fair and square. I didn’t come in first place nor did I come in second; I was dead last. This particular board game is meant for kids, and even though I had no intention of beating my young companions, I didn’t think I would be so terrible. We hadn’t been playing long before the sister turned to me and said with a straight face: “You’re really bad at this game.” There is nothing quite as humiliating as an insult from someone who is less than half your age. I haven’t played that game since.
– Late Night TV –
This particular situation was mostly my fault, but have no fear because it had nothing to do with my young charges. For an extended period of time, I had a steady babysitting job with a family who lived in my neighborhood. One night while sitting at their house, I decided to watch some television after the kids were sound asleep; of course I had the parents’ permission. It was late at night, and there was a thunderstorm brewing. Of all the things I could have watched, I settled on a crime show. That was my first mistake. I eventually decided TV was a bad idea, and picked up the book I brought with me which just so happened to be a mystery. That was my second mistake. My third and final mistake was leaving only one lamp on. I’m not sure why, but I never turned on the room light to make myself feel safer. It was a tense few hours. I didn’t know nighttime could be so noisy! I can’t even tell you how many times I checked the doors and windows to make sure they were locked ( once I built up the courage to do so ). When the parents arrived through the garage, I naturally thought they were murderers until they stepped into the house and greeted me by name. That was the last time I ever watched a crime show or read a mystery while babysitting.
– I Cry Fowl –
I will ease you into the fourth and final story with the typical babysitting story of a bird in the garage. It happened while I was outside with the “chutes and ladders siblings” for some fresh air and playing time. While taking a brief break from the sun, a curious bird joined us. He was harmless, but I couldn’t help panicking. The brother’s personality was unpredictable, and I pictured him opening the door and accidentally letting our new winged friend inside the house. Of course I had to cage (get it?!) my fear so the kids wouldn’t panic and do what I just described. I spoke softly and encouraged them to stay still so the bird wouldn’t feel threatened. He explored a little more and flew away, never to bother us again. Crisis avoided! I swear the animal kingdom is out to get me.
– Dino and the Popsicles –
I realize that the title sounds like a cool band name, but the following events are anything but cool. Literally! I was once again babysitting my neighbors, but this time it was during the day. The parents provided popsicles and told me the kids could play outside. Simple enough, right? WRONG!! When the time came, the siblings grabbed their cold, refreshing popsicles, and we ventured outdoors into the unbearable heat & humidity. After some quality playing time with their dog Dino, the sister informed me that she had to use the restroom. I thought nothing of it until she went to turn the doorknob, and nothing happened. I thought the door was stuck because that is normal in Texas, and I gave it a try. Nothing happened, and my heart started to sink into my stomach. I took some deep breaths and reminded myself that I had to stay calm because I was in charge of two kids and one dog. I made my way to the front of the house to try the garage door; I brought along the sister because she was old enough to stay calm and help me with the code to open the door from the outside. I managed to get the garage door open, but the door to the house was locked, and we had no luck finding the spare key. Trust me, I searched high and low. I had told the brother stay in the backyard with the dog; thankfully the garage wasn’t far from the gate so the sister and I pulled double duty keeping a close eye on them. Unfortunately that didn’t work. The little boy gave in to his curiosity and opened the gate before we could reach him. That wasn’t my main concern. Remember who he was with!! I spent the next 10-15 minutes running up and down the street yelling “DINO!!” No, this is not an unaired episode of The Flintstones. I desperately tried to shepherd him into the gate held open by the sister while simultaneously keeping my eye on the brother because, as you already know, he was very unpredictable (typical at his age). He tried to help by joining in with his small but mighty voice, but really it was just more noise and extra stress. Finally I got that darn dog into the backyard and locked all of us in. I had a mischievous dog and two sweaty, sticky kids in my care, and I felt helpless. I hated to pull them away from something important, but I had to inform the parents of our predicament since I had tried every other way to get back inside. Thankfully I had my phone on me so I called and left a calm, collected message. I spent the next hour or so keeping the kids distracted on the trampoline until their parents came to our rescue. I profusely apologized and fully expected to never work for them again. The parents shocked me by apologizing about their faulty lock, which they forgot to tell me about before leaving, and applauded my ability to stay calm in a stressful situation. I did indeed work for them again, and thankfully the preceding story was the worst experience I ever had, both with them and with babysitting period. It was a tough experience to go through, but I learned a lot.
Today I am reviewing products from Anthology Candles, a company owned by Rheney Williams and her husband Stephen. Their soy products are whimsically inspired by music, movies, & books. Keep reading for information on their candles, mini candles, & wax tarts. My Youtube review video will be posted at the end for those of you who want to see the products in action.
The top white layer is clean river water; the middle lavender layer is a floral blend; and the bottom purple layer is a mixture of flowers & water. There is no need to burn the candle down to smell each layer; it immediately smells clean and floral. If you like strongly scented candles that fill a room within minutes, this is not the product for you. It took an hour for me to smell the scent, and even then I had to remain within a foot or two to enjoy it. Once it is burnt, the candle’s scent is hidden by the smell of burnt wick. As time goes on, the scent comes back and gets stronger. The draw of this candle is definitely the aesthetic. The design, inspired by the lantern scene in the Disney film Tangled, is spot on. The white wax becomes transparent when burning and makes the candle appear as though it is a lantern. The effect is mesmerizing! If you are planning a Tangled party, think about investing in these candles and creating your very own “Floating Lanterns” scene.
• Find the candles here: https://anthologycandles.com/collections/candles
Instead of purchasing more big candles, I got a sampler pack of four mini candles. Belle’s Library is aged library books, hint of leather, & wild roses. To me, it smells nutty with a hint of rose. My nose is obviously confusing the smell of old books for nuts. I don’t know of any other way to describe it. It just smells nutty! Mad Hatter’s Tea Party is bakery cakes with vanilla icing, chamomile tea, and a twist of cinnamon. I do smell cinnamon and occasionally vanilla but mostly an icee. I know that sounds crazy but it’s true! Part of Your World is crisp coastal breeze & warm golden sand. I smell a blend of vanilla & flowers, and the strength of the scent reminds me of Bath & Body Works products. Tink’s Flight is fresh verbena, sweet coconut, & tangy lime. I smell every single one of those notes. The scent is sweet & sour just like Tinker Bell. Time for the bad news. The wicks are folded down in the packaging so when it comes time to light them, zip zilch NADA! I had to trim the wicks a little bit and wipe them gently with a paper towel; I wasted a lot of matches before finally getting flames. Once lit, the candles look pretty but don’t smell at all. These sampler candles are fine if you plan on testing the scents without flame. It might be a better investment to know what scents you like and buy a few big candles.
• Find the mini candles here: https://anthologycandles.com/collections/sample-packs
* Note: Wax tarts are cubes of scent-infused wax. Once placed in a warmer (e.g. Scentsy), the heat melts the wax and releases the scent.
I bought one sampler and received four different wax tarts. Rivendell is amber, oakmoss, twilight woods, & woodland foliage. I wish I could tell you that my dream of being a Middle Earth elf was fulfilled by this product. Alas, it smells like play-doh, and the warmer is no help at all. However, due to circumstances I cannot explain, the scent is improving. There is hope yet! Soaring Over is orange blossoms, orange groves, and salty sea breeze. The scent is inspired by the Disney park ride Soaring Over California. It smells of oranges and takes me right back to my childhood in Orange County. The Black Pearl is cannonball smoke, mildewy wood, musty “pirates” water, & salty sea breeze. I did not like this funky scent at first. All you smell is must, mildew, and smoke. Surprise of the year, it smells much more pleasant in the warmer. If you aren’t into scents that are clean, floral, and/or sweet, this scent might float your boat (get it?!). Wilderness Lodge is campfire and a forest tree mix of juniper, pine, & spruce. This spicy forest scent will be p-e-r-f-e-c-t for Christmastime. Overall, I am very happy with the scents I purchased. However, much like the candles, it takes an hour or more for the scent to be recognizable, and it does not fill the room; you have to be within a few feet of the warmer to enjoy the scent.
* Rivendell scent description courtesy of http://ritareviews.net/2015/11/anthology-candles-spotlight-lord-of-the-rings/ *
• Find the wax tarts here: https://anthologycandles.com/collections/wax-tarts
Conclusion:
The novelty of Anthology Candles is attractive. I would recommend their products for two things:
1. The candles and wax tarts are best enjoyed in close proximity (e.g. bedside table or living room side table).
2. I have seen the candles used as decor all over Instagram, especially on bookshelves.
My overall experience was good. There are only a few changes I would suggest.
1. There are descriptions on the website for the candles but not the wax tarts. This works out fine if the wax tart happens to have a candle, but if it doesn’t, there is no way of knowing what the scent is. Also, the packaging gives no indication of the scent.
2. The mini candle sampler packs are not customizable. There are three packs available, each with a set group of candles. I am not sure of the possible complications, but it would be nice to have a customization option in the future.
3. The wax tarts can only be purchased in groups of four. Once again, a customization option would be nice in the future.
4. These products would be much more enjoyable and worth the money if the scents were stronger.
• My review video:
• If you’re interested in more information on Anthology Candles, here are some links to get you started:
It’s that time of year folks, the time when earth feels like it’s roasting inside a sauna over the flames of hell. When I’m not concealing sweat at work, I’m sitting in front of a fan at home pretending I live in a colder climate. Not only is it hot, but California is rain-free, dry, and on high alert for fires. Fun times! Now that I’ve brought you up to speed on the weather report, prepare yourself for a story eerily similar to one I told one year ago. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, click the following link and study up:
The night was June 21, 2016 and the time approximately midnight. The night air was refreshingly cool. The window was open and the fan blasting. I was spread out on the couch preparing to enjoy some therapy a-la-Netflix. In one moment, my seemingly perfect summer night came screeching to a halt. I heard the haunting buzz of a large insect and wasted no time in jumping off the couch and turning on the light. As soon as I did so, I caught sight of movement in the window. The volume of my voice raised slightly as I exclaimed that there was a bug inside the house. He was not very happy with my actions because next thing I know he’s flying at me. I ran down the stairs yelling “NO NO NO NO NO!!!!!” My mom came out of her bedroom to see what was going on, and my dad expressed concern from the comfort of his bed. Armed with a shoe and Lysol, I made my mom accompany me while I checked every single window in the house. I was not about to sleep with a huge bug on the loose!! After many tears and a panic attack, I shut myself in my room (after numerous inspections) and did my best to sleep despite intense anxiety and a migraine. The next day my mom informed me that she had found a dead June bug in her bedroom. I felt immediate deja vu. What is it with my mom and I fighting June bugs??!!!
Don’t you just love summer?? 😡
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The official 30th birthday of Pixar was February 3rd, but the celebration is lasting all year long. Let’s throw our own “party” readers. I’m going to answer some Pixar-related questions. Feel free to participate and leave your own answers in the comment section below. :)
(I’m counting both of these movies as one) I have been touched emotionally by a lot of Pixar movies, the “Toy Story” series being at the top of the list. However, there is something so unique and mesmerizing about the concept and execution of “Monsters Inc” and “Monsters University.” Also, the relationship between Sully, Mike, & Boo never ceases to tug at my heartstrings.
Mike Wazowski is stubborn. No matter how many times he gets knocked down and told no, he gets back up and finds a way. Woody hates change, but once he lets you into his heart, he never lets go. Mike is a fighter, and Woody is a friend; I’d like to think those two labels describe me as well. 💖
I just watched this scene on Youtube and cried. It gets me every time!! 😭 I think this scene affects me so deeply because I said a final goodbye to childhood within the past 4 years. My childhood wasn’t perfect, but I can say with confidence that I pushed my imagination to infinity and beyond. ;) Some people may not understand, but it was very hard for me when I started giving away my movies and toys. I cried giving away my “Blue’s Clues” movies, not because I wanted to keep them but rather I truly cherished every piece of knowledge I had gained through that TV program. When I sold my barbies, I took the time to clean them up and make them look nice because they had given me so many adventures; I wanted the next child to have the same experiences. I still feel stuck in a transition period. I am constantly listening to old songs and drowning myself in nostalgia. Never be embarrassed to step back in time in order to feel happy. :)
– Favorite Song –
No contest! “Life is a Highway” from “Cars.” I dare you to watch the movie and resist the urge to sing along. 🎶
“There’s no load I can’t hold
Road so rough this I know
I’ll be there when the light comes in
Just tell ’em we’re survivors.”
Video Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5tXh_MfrMe0
